'Engaging the Enemy'

           Click  HERE  to play this short video piece .  Today 49 years ago, I made my dear late Mum both laugh and cry at the same time. You wouldn't think it today, but I was born 6 weeks premature. Roll on to the present and I can assure you I have still no patience and am a stickler for time keeping. Mind you, I was 20mins late for a (non urgent) appointment this morning but still my mind still sees this as a big deal. I think it's a premature baby thing. If I was a lecturer today, I would be adding the words, "please discuss" lol. I always believe actions speak louder than words, so with that in mind, do please click the above link to play this short video. I preferred on this occasion to use my birthday to add some sentiments and of course shed a thought or three on the amazing support I am currently getting from everyone.  The Birthday today was just fabolous. The day just flew by. I met up with 2 separate individuals who I haven...

  'Capt. Murf' With last Tuesdays blast of encouraging news (rather than a blast of chemotherapy), I have been running around the place. Here, there, sorting out my latest and newly acquired security gadget, a networked doorbell that pushes our front doorbell to my iPhone with inbound HD live picture and two-way live audio. I read about this product in one of Richard Branson's posts on his LinkedIn page, where he listed his own personal choice of best 16 startups in 2016. I figure, if it's good enough for Richard Branson, it's good enough for me.  With this product I can literally answer 'the doorbell' from my bed (if resting up)  or indeed live from the hospital during my next (Toxic) Tuesday if the doorbell rings. All HD camera video captures are  also automatically recorded and sent instantly to the cloud where I can replay that footage immediately via the app on my phone. If you take a look at the below short film piece, you can see (pun intended) that i...

    My Icon, My Hero and he took the time to do this.  Ever since my late teens, for whatever reason, I took a fascinating interest in one person. The fact that he was always smiling or was indeed wearing a big infectious grin probably helped. But it was more than that. That Can Do (and will do) attitude, that harder it is-the more I want to do it, that anti-establishment twist to things, that was the draw for me to this person. Over the years, as I strived (with my monocular vision) to get licensed to fly Hot Air Balloons and later Helicopters, at the back of it all, my inspiration came from one individual, one pretty unique person... ...one single   (Sir) Richard Branson.  The above jaw dropping surprise came in to our living room last Wednesday night. A friend and neighbour, Domhnall Dervan called over with a parcel under his arm. Before I was allowed open the package, Domhnall reminded me that some months ago, I posted on my Facebook book page my ultimate wi...

  Monday night my stomach was in a heap. I knew I was meeting my medical team the following morning (Tuesday). Not easy to do but the 5 days of waiting since my CT SCANS were taken, I had to compartmentalise my mind. Anything else and it would drive a madman insane, I said that last piece on purpose, think about it.  I had to look at it like a change in meteorological conditions during a balloon flight. How ? Well in that this has already happened and regardless what I do, think or say, it will NOT influence the end scenario. Just fly the balloon Aidan, as best and as safely as you can. That's exactly what I did. Keeping my sanity till I got Tuesday mornings scan results.  Alison drove me on the 40 minute drive to the Bons Secour Private Hospital in Glasnevin, Dublin. My stomach was without a doubt totally knotted. A trip to the toilet before leaving confirmed it. All the days of not thinking about today had vanished. My mind was now locked in results mode and it was not ...

It's approaching 5am here and I've been awake since 3am. I have to own up and admit the last 2 nights saw me just feeling like.. Crap!! I hate that word but right now it's the right one to use.  If you are on similar treatment to me this may well resonate with you. It's not a nauseous thing, more like a deep down feeling of being very low,  but also feeling tired at the same time. Going to bed and burying myself deep under the duvet, when done just felt so appropriate, if I'm let use that word.  Last night, with that 'crap' feeling visiting me again, circa 10pm I went to bed. As I climbed the stairs I could feel the onslaught of a wave of emotions all gathering up. They were coming in thick and fast and bed was the last thing these mental vibrations had on their mind. Then, wallop, they knocked me for six. These vibrations as I've just christened them found my voice and took over.  "I can't take this shit anymore. Why me? what did I do on you go...

  This appeared in my inbox when I got home yesterday.  " St. Pio  bless  all of us  and help  who  in this moment  needs you..." Photo Courtesy of Claudia Steri.  Checkpoint Charlie  (or "Checkpoint C") was the name given by the  Western Allies  to the best-known  Berlin   Wall crossing  point between  East Berlin  and  West Berlin  during the  Cold War  (1947–1991). 'C' being the operative letter here so I christened yesterday (my first time to get scanned since my diagnosis) as my ' Checkpoint C ', AKA my  Checkpoint Charlie.  The day before yesterday, I have to admit to being worked up thinking of my scan the following day. My thoughts were overwhelming and I got physically upset of nearly all of Wednesday morning. My mind appeared to be  doing what I would call a complete stocktake since day one of my diagnosis. The horrible sensations  to date that have infe...

    A long lost friend sends a perfectly timed text last night.  I haven't updated my blog in a few days, mainly due to not being in the best of form. Every so often since I got ill, my tummy throws a wobbler and it's very unpleasant. I'm not going to go ultra graphic here but if I said it's a cross between having the runs and being constipated (alternating every 30mins), you will grasp the whole horrible and indeed somewhat confusion of it all. You see, it's the side affects of the tablets that cause this and it throws my mind into a somewhat 'no mans limbo'. This can happen once a week to me and over 2 hours, but this time it took 48 hours.. Horrible !! I've said it before here, but as I am fighting this battle, my mind plays a very important role.  People have and still tell me how positive my head is in all of this. I thank them for their kind words and then later during a quiet moment I tend to reflect on what we just chatted about. My mind might be...

I'm now 4 days inclusive post my last infusion of Chemo (this is my 4th day). I was dreading the first few days post Chemo. You see, it's the 2nd time I had to defer by a week which meant it was 4 weeks of a break rather than 3. For the avoidence of doubt (one of my favourite phrases), I also take Chemo daily via tablet form.  A few close friends have asked me recently, " on the same day, what does it feel like when you get your new IV infusion of your cocktail of chemotherapy'"? It's a direct question for sure, but the answer? well my answer is somewhat skewed but like all my blogs here, I'll tell you as it is.  My response on how it feels to me: " An exhausted mind that thinks it's my stomach coupled with my  stomach that's not sure whether  it wants to vent off via my mouth or my rear end. Pretty confusing, Isn't it? While I'm in this state of what I  now personally refer to and have come to recognise as been Chemotozed , I purposel...